Just as the pandemic was beginning to sink into a lull over here in the U.S., the weight of the world somehow got heavier. I don’t need to recount the tragedies we’re all reading about in the news each day—I’m here to remind you that our expansion of self and soul are still important. Our journey to slay self-limiting beliefs does not need to be put on the back burner. Our sensual and self-indulgent rituals need not go anywhere but stay right where they are. Now is no better time than ever to focus on developing our spiritual and psychological practices and resources.
The universe doesn’t need me to slip into a pit of despair, I am no good as an anxious ball of nerves, and I cannot serve my community if I am drowning in guilt for my privilege, my success, and daring to ask for more.
Because I am daring to ask for more.
I can extend sympathy and compassion to those near and far suffering from world events right now. I can give in my own way, within my own capacity and find pleasure. I am on the cusp of great transformation. I am reaching within to face my inner Magician so that I can step into new roles where I can grow and impact others in a newfound way. THIS is my contribution to fighting the evil and unjust forces.
I did not have the boldness to stand up for myself several years ago. My body was conditioned to become adrift, like an untethered boat. I felt debilitated, unable to wipe the metaphorical fog off the window to see the myriad budding possibilities. I was doing the best I could, but I couldn’t rise to the occasion. It was a different time in the same body but with a different resilience of soul and spirit.
What has changed?
Through a practice of nurturing my nervous system and reconnecting with my body, I have emerged from a deep and dark slumber that was keeping me small and unquestioning. I am in a process of becoming embodied.
My nervous system is in a different place than it was three years ago. Once I developed and revitalized my toolbox for treating my nervous system, the heavy weights holding me back began to dissipate. Through bodywork, somatic tracking, brain therapy exercises, connecting with my body through dance, trauma healing, and meditations, I have found a new baseline. I apply each and every tool from a conscious feminine perspective–letting go of my control of outcomes and ceasing attempts to think my way out of problems.
My consistent feminine dance movement practice–even when that meant tuning into a Zoom class in the height of shelter in place–has kept me in close contact with my chronically stressed body through the pandemic, California forest fires, the election, physical injuries, civil unrest, and now international unrest. When my inner flame was barely lit, I danced with defensive posturing and a hoodie over my head, but every time my practice reminded me that I still had my inner feminine strength. It couldn’t be snuffed out.
“When a woman stops doing she must learn how to simply be. Being is not a luxury; it is a discipline. The heroine must listen carefully to her true inner voice. That means silencing the other voices anxious to tell her what to do. She must be willing to hold the tension until the new form emerges. Anything less than that aborts growth, denies change, and reverses transformation. Being takes courage and demands sacrifice.”The Heroine’s Journey, Marleen Murdock
The natural byproduct of honoring my body and nervous system is unwavering feminine courage. The illusions and lies that tricked me into accepting the status quo have been exposed. My inner guides and goddesses speak to me with clarity. I have a deep knowing that feels like a concentration of energy in my chest, propelling me to take bigger risks, ask for more, and chase my pleasure.
When we’re feeling overwhelmed by recent life events, we have all the inner resources we need to bring ourselves back home, spiritually and psychologically—to vibrate higher and emanate positive energy that can change our world.